Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Life can be such a hassle!! I am trying to get my work done and the girls are trying to take away my bearings!! I feel blessed to have them, but getting them to eighteen is going to be a different story! They may get me certified for that pretty white jacket with no sleeves and the pretty white room where there's a whole lot of padding....oh, the comfort of that thought...oops, better wake up now. Some dreams will never come true. Do y'all remember the show Rosanne?? Well, I feel like her..."Jail? Take me. You mean someone will wash my clothes and bring me my food?" I miss Rosanne! I think if I compared myself to someone, I'm much like her in the show. Not as heavy, but I'm very ironic about life in general. Some folks think I'm funny, but I don't mean to be. For instance, the girls think the smallest scratch or drop of blood means death. I just look at it and say, "I'm so sorry, but it looks like you will live for one more day". But, my kids grew up with me like this and they know how to take me. My girls are so funny. One is a blond, and let me tell you, she is true to the bone blond! She is also a clown. She can just say something stupid and the whole room will break out laughing. She likes to be the entertainment. At the same time, let me remind you that she is ten years old, she is so smart when it comes to everyday life. She loves fishing, deer hunting, water tubing, mudding, four-wheeling, horseback riding, hiking, and just anything that uses energy. My oldest, on the other hand, is twelve, and brunette, with the personality of not caring what others think of her. She will speak her mind in a heartbeat. When she was around four and five, I know of many times I just wanted the ground to swallow me for something she blurted out. I remember one day, she was four, and we were at Wal-Mart and walked passed a really large lady. She goes to yelling, "Mommy, you're not fat!! Look at her!" The whole time, she's pointing right at the lady and I'm telling her, "That is not nice and I do not want to hear such things coming out of your mouth!" How embarrassing. She was very good with words, still is. She is an honor roll English/Writing student. When she was two, she wouldn't say "that's ucky" like most kids do. She said, "That's disgusting." It was so funny because when she started pre-K, they would ask her what these words meant(thinking she had only heard them being used) and she was able to tell them. Another thing that is ironic about her is that simple math is very hard for her. But, when they grilled her on algebra without giving her a pencil and paper, she was able to answer the problem, without help, in under thirty seconds, the school administrator told me. But, with her having bipolar disorder, her social skills aren't up to par, therefore, holding her back from the many things she could accomplish! I feel so helpless that she has to deal with this. I try to make it easier for her to cope with, but nothing I can do will matter, until she reaches that stage in maturity where she sees for herself that she is bonding herself and keeping herself from the spectacular things she is capable of. I hate to see her grow up fast, but I do long for the day that she sees that she can control some of her issues, without medicines, and then she will acquire all that life has to offer her! Patience is truly a virtue. If you had ever experienced raising a child with all these mental disabilities, you know exactly what I am talking about.
Okay, I am out for now. See y'all tomorrow in class,

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